IS it my LIFE??
IS it really the life I want to live...was i like this before?I somehow feel that i have started losing myself ...that exuberance...that excitement...that enthusiasm...that chirpiness...everything seems to be missing...who is responsible??MY OWN SELF...I am too much worried about the past that has gone outta my hand...about the "mundane" present...about the "worried" future....i think b4 picking a newspaper to read whether i am really spending the time correctly....i dont even know what i like to do in free time...i have lost myself in thinking what shud be done sooo much that i forgot my likes...i dont like sth...i don dislike sth...i just do things...i am not looking forward for nething...i HATE this....sometimes i feel...that i have supressed my wild likes so much that i stopped liking anything now....i absent mindedly walk... talk.....go abt doing things in life...nothing excites me...i feel aged..old...i am in total confusion...i think a person is confused when he has too many good options...but i am confused without having any options itself....what i want to do?whether i will like doing what i am planning to do..?whether it is OK to not know what i like to do?can i ever like doing sth and really do?all my life...i think i will keep searching for that thing to do...its driving me crazy...i am restless...actually i am not in a such a bad situation....when compared to many others...but why do i feel so?do i expect too much from life...from myself?is it the prob that every 22+ person has....is it alright?when i question myself..."what do i want to do"...i have many answers....but for how long u want to do nethng...i might not have an answer...sometimes i feel i get bored with things...very easily...sometimes i try liking sth coz i dont want to dislike it.....why do i have to stop myself from disliking sth...coz u never know wen u have to do that what u dislike...all i am thinking abt is myself...am i even thinking abt ppl arnd me...frends family...i forget bdays...i forget imp things...all i keep thinking is what i am planning to do is right or not...if this attitude continues...i know i will never like what i will be doing....leave me alone...WONDERING AND WANDERING IN MY OWN WORRYLAND!!
IS it really the life I want to live...was i like this before?I somehow feel that i have started losing myself ...that exuberance...that excitement...that enthusiasm...that chirpiness...everything seems to be missing...who is responsible??MY OWN SELF...I am too much worried about the past that has gone outta my hand...about the "mundane" present...about the "worried" future....i think b4 picking a newspaper to read whether i am really spending the time correctly....i dont even know what i like to do in free time...i have lost myself in thinking what shud be done sooo much that i forgot my likes...i dont like sth...i don dislike sth...i just do things...i am not looking forward for nething...i HATE this....sometimes i feel...that i have supressed my wild likes so much that i stopped liking anything now....i absent mindedly walk... talk.....go abt doing things in life...nothing excites me...i feel aged..old...i am in total confusion...i think a person is confused when he has too many good options...but i am confused without having any options itself....what i want to do?whether i will like doing what i am planning to do..?whether it is OK to not know what i like to do?can i ever like doing sth and really do?all my life...i think i will keep searching for that thing to do...its driving me crazy...i am restless...actually i am not in a such a bad situation....when compared to many others...but why do i feel so?do i expect too much from life...from myself?is it the prob that every 22+ person has....is it alright?when i question myself..."what do i want to do"...i have many answers....but for how long u want to do nethng...i might not have an answer...sometimes i feel i get bored with things...very easily...sometimes i try liking sth coz i dont want to dislike it.....why do i have to stop myself from disliking sth...coz u never know wen u have to do that what u dislike...all i am thinking abt is myself...am i even thinking abt ppl arnd me...frends family...i forget bdays...i forget imp things...all i keep thinking is what i am planning to do is right or not...if this attitude continues...i know i will never like what i will be doing....leave me alone...WONDERING AND WANDERING IN MY OWN WORRYLAND!!
posted by Anupama | 9:52 AM
3 Comments:
hey anu..hmm u know u r not the only one in this situation!!but i think i realized this long b4 u did..so some gyan to offer..
tehre is this tshirt caption.."i love my job its the work that i hate!".
besides being funny..it does leave a great bit of gyan. Follow your passion..it might take time to realise what it is..but sure u r not doing something wrong if that is not the chosen one..or the one that earns u ur bread.Probly we'll lose interest in our so cald "passions" if we did take them up seriously.Just relax..the change thats taking place now is for the good.I am wid u:)
thx da!!the last sentence bowled me over..:)...hopefully...i start liking what i am gng to do:|
A true geminian!!
Would like to have changes everytime, and I am sure about one thing..
'A change is always encouraging' So what you are planning will surely get you out of this situation.
And I am sure, you will be back to your best known form!!
Keep ROCKING anuji :)
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